At Home At last

At last,I'm home.

Just went for a training camp. I'm the assistant organiser of game session.

I take part in most of the activities.

Basically, my job is to

prepare stuffs for following lessons,

make sure things flowing according to schedule

and a little part of everything.

However, I still don't quite know why am I doing all of it.

Actually, I'm still not feeling that good, still not so happy at there.

Still feels lonely. Besides, I don't have a group. I'm a teacher already,

this made me even more lonely.

So far, I think the only reason

I'm going is just to test my ability on doing and managing things.

End of the post.

Thanks for reading.

Why am I doing all these?

Recently going to have a few camps during my holidays.

Its a voluntarily job, where I worked as a teacher at there.

And these few camps filled up most of my holiday.

At first, I'm doing all this, because I know for sure its a good thing, its a right thing to do.

However, I'm starting to doubt about it. Why am I keep doing all this.

My friends keep asking me, but I can't give them an good answer which can satisfy them, and I can't find a good point for me going there either,

other then its a good thing.

For quite a number of years I had been going to the camps organised by them.

Teacher at there are friendly, but some friends at there make me kinda disappointed.

I really don't know why some people still so selfish at there, likes looking down on people which are not so 'famous', such as me.

C'mon, I didn't owe you anything.

Maybe this year is the final year I'm going to these camp at there, because end of next year I will be having an important exam.

The following year, I don't even know where am I gonna be.

Now, I will do all my best for the following 5 camps.I will really work hard for it, and the end.

By me, thanks for reading,

have a nice day.

MR Lonely

I might be in a crowd,

I might be sitting by the table with bunch of friends,

but,

still feels loneliness.

I got no idea why this happened to me.

I had quite a lot of friends, but when hanging out with them,

I still feels lone. All of them sitting together,

while I always just sitting at aside, looking them laugh and chat.

It make me feel like I'm just a nobody that no one wanna to concern.

No one to depend on, no one to rely on.

Just doing almost all the thing by my own.

Thanks for reading,

has been in a negative mood for some time.

Relieved

Today was a tiring day, but i felt a little relieved.

Yesterday,

The research and development stuffs, my group members had divided the job quite well, and they had some progression.

So, they can do it without me for the moment. Just hope that, they don't always waiting, and procrastinating.

This afternoon,

And, about KRS, it was a safe and nice day today. We don't have time for KRS's session. Besides, we can leave all the KRS stuffs till next year. Yeah man...

Now,

Maybe I'm still thinking too much for the moment. I really need some rest, stay calm, and not thinking too much.

I'm Really Stressed

In charge of many things recently.

There are a lot of things need to be done.

Actually, many of it can be done by other people, but they just... somehow, like waiting me to do it, or plan it.

At the begining, I was able to get it all done.

Recently,

I'm really stressed. Having problems on getting on bed, seriously lack of quality time.

And, now...

I decided, to start letting go part of my works, let it done by others. Maybe things came out isn't that bad as i thought. Or perhaps, its my aim is too high. I wanted things to be done perfectly.

I feels lonely too. I felt that, I don't have someone to rely on.

Feels like I'm dealing with many tasks and prblems myself alone most of the time.

I need someone that can give me help when I needed it. Not those just saying one, I mean those really can give me help in a useful way.

Anyway, thanks for reading,

have a nice day.

Recently...

Just don't know why, recently keep thinking lots of things.

All of it coming to my mind non stop... Mostly about future. About career, and things I need to own.

Future is really kinda scary.

A few of my friends said that, I think too much. I know it too, but i just can't stop thinking. I felt that many people, mostly are my family members, are looking up at me. I really feel stress, and end up eating lots of chips and tib bits to let me stay focus on the thing I am doing.

Hopefully, I can get over this as soon as possible.

Thanks for reading.

Quote of the day

Quote of the day

Failing to plan,

is planning to fail.