Hope Which Only Last For 5 Minutes

There's a girl, means a lot to me. Although she disappoints me a lot.

While today after school, something happened. She waited me and walked with me together.

I wasn't really very happy on it although I was hoping for it long time ago,

but at least, it made me feels a little relieved.

About 5 minutes later,

a guy came from behind, and they talked and laughed,

and walked in a faster pace.

And once again,

I'm left behind watching her talking and laughing around with other people.

Just when she fixed my heart a little, she breaks it even more.

Having the feeling of losing the thing while I'm having it.

What a day.

The end. Thanks for reading.

Wasn't here for quite awhile.

Still Have Fate On It

It has been about a year ago.

Giving tuition on weekdays,

not doing it for the pay,

but for the experience,

communicating skills,

and most importantly

made quite a number of new friends.

" Hi teacher!!!",

greetings from my student in school.

( some of my student are studying at the same school with me )

It made me feels relieved.

Students still remember me

after quite some time.

Students and me,

saying Hi with each other,

nothing much, but why,

Even myself,

I seldom greet the teacher in the school.

Feels kinda shame of myself.

By the way,

let back to the main topic.

I started giving tuition again.

Had five Year 1 student.

Three of them are Indians,

and guess what subject I'm teaching?

Chinese.

Yes, I'm not lying.

They are really cute,

the way they pronounce the Chinese words,

the way they asked questions.

So cute, so clean,

without any hidden motive.

All they want is just happiness.

Teaching them are really much more enjoying.

Unlike the tuition centre I went last time.

Well, not to mention so much about

unhappy memories.

My new boss,

is a quite good person.

She is fierce, but cute,

and have a sense of humour too.

My pay was quite good,

so far everything still going on the right path.

And I still have the fate on teaching.

I know today's post is a bit long,

but words keep popping out of my mind,

and I just wrote them all out.

=)

Thanks for reading.

Revolution of CNY

Happy Chinese New Year everyone.

Another year has passed, and another year had came.

For me,

I'm not really in the CNY mood yet,

even though its beginning of a new year already.

My family,

especially my dad.

I don't know why,

why is he always the mood spoiler.

Going back hometown during CNY suppose to be

in a happy environment,

but end up rushing back,

and something was left at home.

Until just now still keep arguing, blaming each other.

What a year.

Revolution of CNY,

many youth changed.

Many of them seldom concern about the real meaning of new year,

their main concern is,

how much angpau money they can get.

While at the mean time,

Adults are so well behaved in front of others,

but many unseen stories in between it.

There are many silly arguments behind all those fake smiles.

People nowadays are very money-minded,

facing difficulties on tolerating with others,

very likely to hold really firm on

what they think is correct.

There are really many more things

I saw,

I realise,

but can't write it all out at once.

Give me some time,

I will work it out for you people

who enjoy reading about

my true feelings & stories here.

Thanks for reading, and

once again,

Wish you all had a real truly Happy Chinese New Year.

Its Sunday

Today is Sunday, it's a normal and simple Sunday.

Just had sausage with bread,

some sliced cucumber,

chips,

a small drink

and some music for my lunch.

Just a simple meal,

on a simple day,

and it's

what I want.

Tidying up my messy bed after lunch.

Not to forget my desk too.

This are what Sundays suppose to be,

at least for me.

Getting things done in a slow pace,

just for today.

There had been rushing for

quite some time, since last holiday.

Finally, now

I had some time,

my own time

for myself.

Not spending too much time here

for today;

Still got half a Sunday

waiting me to enjoy it.

Thanks for reading.

Wish you had a happy Sunday.

Difference Nor ?

Its a brand new year,

I saw many things changed.

People, market trend,

way of doing things,

and even myself too.

Well, physically I didn't changed that much.

Still having similiar hair style,

same specs, same smile on the same face.

But, my thinking are different now.

I can feel that the way

I judge the state of affair are different.

All of a sudden, I think that

everything happens for some reasons,

or at least an objective.

We need to see it in different views.

There are always complicated details in a simple things.

But, why?

Why can't we just make it

more simple, and easier.

Why are people keep demanding for more,

but seldom commit to others?

Why can't they be satisfy and grateful of what they have?

What a simple thing, and

there are so many things related into it.

For me,

I will continue doing the things that I think it right.

I will do things without asking for pay back,

but it doesn't means I will do everything.

I'm not being selfish,

it just I got nothing to lost.

Thanks for reading,

Have a nice day.

《静思语》

《静思语》

人若能减低欲望，

生活上

便没有什么值得计较。

New Year, New Aims

I realized and learned a thing at the end of last year,

That is not to be so persistent.

Things will not always go according to what we planned.

Besides,

we won't able to get things we want most of the time,

because everything is interrelated to each other.

Too many conditions, too many backgrounds...

What we can do is just to manipulate us,

so that we can keep our pace with the change.

Year of 2011,

an important year again.

Will be taking an exam,

which decides where will I be for the following years.

I know its really crucial.

I will give all out, and do the best for it.

I said it, I meant it.

Another aim of this year is,

I want to say goodbye to Mr Lonely.

Really need someone,

which we can share everything with each other,

joy and sorrow...

Okay, that's it for now.

Gotta sleep. Good nights people.

Well, I know

Well, second camp had just over.

During this time, all of us need to write

our feelings,

some significant things happened on that day, and

pass it up to the teacher at the end of the day.

I wrote my feelings and things I wanted to present on my journal

and, from teacher's comment,

I can feel that its encouraging me to do better.

However, things that mentioned,

I'm already doing it most of the time, I'm not trying to be proud here.

They also mentioned, behind every success person,

there are sorrows which other people don't know.

I guess, I am facing some of it now.

The following camp,

not much focus on learning new things,

but to gain more experience.

I Will Be Myself

It has been for some time,

keeps on doing things that

I'm not so happy with it.

Just because they asked,

and I had to get through so many things.

Yes, I do learnt things, gained new experience from it,

but, I think I can learn it with some other happy ways.

Never mind,

from now on,

I won't keep doing things that people asked me to.

I will think before I take any action.

I will not keep on tolerating other people.

The one that will not care what other people thinking about me.

Yes, this is me, the real me.

The happier me..

End of the post.

Thx for readin'

Hav'a nice day.

At Home At last

At last,I'm home.

Just went for a training camp. I'm the assistant organiser of game session.

I take part in most of the activities.

Basically, my job is to

prepare stuffs for following lessons,

make sure things flowing according to schedule

and a little part of everything.

However, I still don't quite know why am I doing all of it.

Actually, I'm still not feeling that good, still not so happy at there.

Still feels lonely. Besides, I don't have a group. I'm a teacher already,

this made me even more lonely.

So far, I think the only reason

I'm going is just to test my ability on doing and managing things.

End of the post.

Thanks for reading.

Why am I doing all these?

Recently going to have a few camps during my holidays.

Its a voluntarily job, where I worked as a teacher at there.

And these few camps filled up most of my holiday.

At first, I'm doing all this, because I know for sure its a good thing, its a right thing to do.

However, I'm starting to doubt about it. Why am I keep doing all this.

My friends keep asking me, but I can't give them an good answer which can satisfy them, and I can't find a good point for me going there either,

other then its a good thing.

For quite a number of years I had been going to the camps organised by them.

Teacher at there are friendly, but some friends at there make me kinda disappointed.

I really don't know why some people still so selfish at there, likes looking down on people which are not so 'famous', such as me.

C'mon, I didn't owe you anything.

Maybe this year is the final year I'm going to these camp at there, because end of next year I will be having an important exam.

The following year, I don't even know where am I gonna be.

Now, I will do all my best for the following 5 camps.I will really work hard for it, and the end.

By me, thanks for reading,

have a nice day.

MR Lonely

I might be in a crowd,

I might be sitting by the table with bunch of friends,

but,

still feels loneliness.

I got no idea why this happened to me.

I had quite a lot of friends, but when hanging out with them,

I still feels lone. All of them sitting together,

while I always just sitting at aside, looking them laugh and chat.

It make me feel like I'm just a nobody that no one wanna to concern.

No one to depend on, no one to rely on.

Just doing almost all the thing by my own.

Thanks for reading,

has been in a negative mood for some time.

Relieved

Today was a tiring day, but i felt a little relieved.

Yesterday,

The research and development stuffs, my group members had divided the job quite well, and they had some progression.

So, they can do it without me for the moment. Just hope that, they don't always waiting, and procrastinating.

This afternoon,

And, about KRS, it was a safe and nice day today. We don't have time for KRS's session. Besides, we can leave all the KRS stuffs till next year. Yeah man...

Now,

Maybe I'm still thinking too much for the moment. I really need some rest, stay calm, and not thinking too much.

I'm Really Stressed

In charge of many things recently.

There are a lot of things need to be done.

Actually, many of it can be done by other people, but they just... somehow, like waiting me to do it, or plan it.

At the begining, I was able to get it all done.

Recently,

I'm really stressed. Having problems on getting on bed, seriously lack of quality time.

And, now...

I decided, to start letting go part of my works, let it done by others. Maybe things came out isn't that bad as i thought. Or perhaps, its my aim is too high. I wanted things to be done perfectly.

I feels lonely too. I felt that, I don't have someone to rely on.

Feels like I'm dealing with many tasks and prblems myself alone most of the time.

I need someone that can give me help when I needed it. Not those just saying one, I mean those really can give me help in a useful way.

Anyway, thanks for reading,

have a nice day.

Recently...

Just don't know why, recently keep thinking lots of things.

All of it coming to my mind non stop... Mostly about future. About career, and things I need to own.

Future is really kinda scary.

A few of my friends said that, I think too much. I know it too, but i just can't stop thinking. I felt that many people, mostly are my family members, are looking up at me. I really feel stress, and end up eating lots of chips and tib bits to let me stay focus on the thing I am doing.

Hopefully, I can get over this as soon as possible.

Thanks for reading.

Quote of the day

Quote of the day

Failing to plan,

is planning to fail.

Problems... ... To decide...

All of a sudden, feels like my schedule are so packed. So many things need to be done in so limited time.

Feels like many duties n jobs given to me in the same moment. Sometimes its hard to prioritize too. I think I should give up as part time tutor or give less tutor class, but, I need extra income. Further more, I'm the chairman of Teens Cadet Society now, I need to plan a list of things.

Really need to think about it wisely. I'm not afraid of facing difficulties, but I'm afraid that I will make a wrong decision. As one decisions will linked to another thing.

So, sometime really having problems on deciding things. Really which I could find someone that can help me to decide.

《静思语》

《静思语》

若能从物质的爱欲中跳脱出来，

心自然天广地阔，

无限丰饶。

I want it too...

Hi, finally i start writing post again.

This morning, i saw a girl, riding on a Kawasaki KLX ( with "P", which means she is still around my age too ). Wow! i wanted it too. i want a Kawasaki KRR. I'm really satisfy even just to have it in 250cc. But, my mom said that i need to fetch my sister. So, at least i need to wait till my sister got her driving license, then only i can get a bike like those. Which means, i still need to wait at least two years. On the other hand, the good thing is, i had a car now. Maybe it's is old, but it's still in a good condition.

Moral of the day

We can't get things that we want all the time. So, it's best we appreciate what we have now.

Thanks for reading. = )

I will try to update my blogmore frequent.

My Blog is dead...

Sorry everyone, will not printing blog until I had a laptop or netbook...

The feel just ain't right writing blog when people stalking beside....